It's The Connection

I was laying in bed this morning, thinking. I need to think through a lot of what I go through, to process it in order to understand it. I was thinking about what I missed most about these relationships that ended; why I needed them. And I realized, I missed the daily connection.

Don't get me wrong. The romance was nice. It was great to get a Valentine's gift for the first time in years, to have someone take me out, to make out like teenagers. Touch is so important, and one can crave it when one doesn't get it for a while.

But I really missed the daily emails from the last guy, and the daily texts from the other. The talking, and flirting, and even just the "How is your day?" One of the best digital moments I had with the last guy was when we were emailing and both of us noted how we were in our respective places, having coffee and watching the news. There - that's the connection.

It is possible that my wanting that connection may have made me appear needy, and I may have been needy for the time being. As I have been communicating with a friend from my past, I realized that he knows me well enough to see that this too shall pass.I may be needy right now, but once the connection is established and I get my needs met, that neediness disappears. Those men who didn't know me couldn't see that. It's part of the process of discovery in any type of relationship.

Connecting with friends is what I have decided I need most right now. That will get me through this storm.