I am getting better at distancing myself from this whole situation and focusing on what I need to do. However, I still find myself thinking about Tom, coming up with ways to "fix" him. I find I get very frustrated and upset afterwards, and usually I'm not certain why.
But recently I realized the reason for my frustration. My fixing is my caretaking need, gone haywire. I think I am even more frustrated because he's not here for me to "fix."
And I know I need to let go of this need to care take, to fix, because it doesn't do either one of us any good. But at least now I know that this is what I need to work on in me. So, I guess, the point is I need to focus on me, take care of me, "fix" me. Everything else will take care of itself in time.
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