I have such a hard time trusting. It is my lesson for right now, I know. I realize that I keep myself closed, shut off, my heart a clenched fist, because I don't trust. Because I fear...because I fear the pain that comes with trusting.
Letting go and letting things happen is so hard. I know it doesn't have to be, but when you want to control everything and make sure things go your way (which we all know, isn't possible), you will get smacked with reality. The problem is, I try to let go, and I try to trust, but maybe I invest too much of my trust in one place.
But maybe I should, and just learn from the lesson. Maybe I need to learn who to trust, and maybe, after all these lessons, I finally will learn. It would be nice to find someone who can loosen that tight fist.
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