What Was That?

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Five Card Story: What Was That?

a Five Card Flickr story created by peche1

flickr photo by Serenae

flickr photo by Serenae

flickr photo by Intrepid Flame

flickr photo by bionicteaching

flickr photo by bionicteaching

It percolated up from the ground, a mass of purple goo, all fetid and bubbling. What was it? No one knew. It consumed us all, starting at the fingertips, digesting us slowly, until we were gone, all gone. Years went by, centuries in fact. Then life returned, small, simple plants and animals, sliding out from the ooze of the earth, then transforming into a myriad of other creatures: swimming, walking, flying. And then we returned, not as we were before. Transformed and aware. Alive.

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Local Wildlife

These are two deer that we saw as we turned the corner towards my boyfriend's house. They may have been the same two which were playfully cavorting near the fence to his property about a week ago. They seem pretty relaxed; only getting skittish when you get within 10 feet of them.

I feel as if I am surrounded by wildlife. I've seen more than I ever remember seeing anyplace else I've lived. For example, I've seen:

• A great blue heron, that sits silently on a small island in a nearby pond;
• A wild turkey, trotting calmly down the dirt road near the reservoir;
• A beaver which almost got itself killed walking across the main road near the bay;
• A very large bird which I believe was a turkey buzzard, nearly blotting out the sun above with its great wingspan;
• A curmudgeonly raccoon that looks at us with disdain and waves his paw when we yell for it to get out of the garden;
• A family of woodchucks grazing on the lawn down the street;
• A mallard which appears near the birdfeeder behind my apartment every spring and patiently waits; in the morning for his female partner to come out of our pool;
• Several bunnies who reside near my apartment (one in the bushes directly outside; it's primary purpose seems to be perplexing my dog).

And there are more - the squirrels and chipmunks that zip across the apartment sidewalks, the hundreds of Canada geese I see daily (in the bay, in the fields - you name it), the toads on the doorstep, the hawks overhead, always circling...

I'm always happier when I see them alive (and not left on the side the road, hapless victims of a brush with modern technology.) And I'm glad they allow me to share their space with them.

Olympic Separation

Four years ago this month my last husband left me without warning, just a note on my pillow when I returned from work. I have several memories of that time:

• My co-workers took me out for beer and appetizers (which they paid for - I couldn't even afford to pay). I found out that week that my supervisor had also had a wife who walked out on him.
• I was sort of in shock, but my son was sort of "oh well, what did you expect?"
• My son also helped me get through this by taking me to several movies. I remember we went to see "Kung Fu Panda' and "Wall-E"
• About four weeks later, the Olympics began. I watched them, remembering that the for the last Olympics, we watched it together and shared the experience.

Four years ago seems like a century to me, in terms of where I was then, and where I am now.

Nothing Wrong with a Little Fun

I had expected to be spending the night completely immersed in work as well as assisting my son apply for college. I had planned the night out so that I would have enough time to get everything done, and get myself to bed at a decent hour.

I didn't realize what I thought I would be doing would take a lot less time than I had expected.

So, what I ended up doing was having a couple of glasses of wine with my dinner. Then I started playing with the computer photo program that I had just installed that day. And started snapping away with the iPad camera..

And this is what happens when you have a little too much time, and a glass or two of wine.

Sometimes They Change

The last time I wrote, I was pretty down. I had just about given up all hope in terms of my relationship.

A friend was talking with me last week. We were discussion relationships, and she talked about issues that she had been having. Boy, when you think you have it bad, talk to someone else, and you'll see things in a completely different way! Well, she asked if the guy I was with would be willing to listen and understand, and, possibly, make changes. I didn't think so.

Apparently, I was wrong. I talked to him, and told him about some of the big things that were bothering me with our relationship. Within a day, things had turned around 180 degrees. He took what I said to heart, and willingly (as opposed to grudgingly) made changes. And it wasn't for just one day. He's been at it, and been more aware of what the issue was, and continues to take steps to make things better. Which, of course, opens the door for me to reciprocate.

And I have. Just when things can sometimes seem their worst, a little unexpected change can make a big difference!

Winning the Battle, but...

Things don't look too good right now. Well, I guess that depends on what side you're one. I remember in my last relationship, I learned about the battle that the celebration of Cinco de Mayo was based on. In America, we think that was when Mexico won its freedom. Not so. It was actually a major battle that was won. However, because of the expenditure of men and resources, the battle was won, but it cost the war.

Sometimes, being right is most important. I understand that. I understand that right now, my boyfriend needs to be right. What hurts so much is that his need to be right negates my need to be understood. I don't care if he is right or wrong. I need to be understood; to be important to him.

I remember when my mother talked to me about the men she dated after my dad died. She told me there was one man who was very nice, and very sweet but, as she said just "didn't get it." I didn't understand what she meant.

I mean, if someone is nice to you, isn't that enough. Now I know. Now I realize I could be anyone in his life. Someone else could come along with similar qualifications as me, and that would be fine with him.

I don't want to be a replaceable part. I want to be the one. I want to be important to one person, and if that person is not someone else, then that person is me.